A blog after a very log time

Its been a very long time since I last wrote my blog.Life has jumped several folds then.Most of them has been very precious and beautiful and I don`t remember the bad ones tough.Met some great minds, learnt a about altogether a new world.Touched new highs, achieved some unexpected targets.Life seemed to be on a roll, but as I am writing this blog, I don`t know what I am doing.

I have always lived with some motive something or the other fiddling around me, trying to solve it,ease it or sometime end it.Things seems to be getting tougher and my mind and heart are not at much of peace tough.Its kind of restlessness which is not allowing me to sit back and enjoy.I am just running like wild horse.

I don`t know what next.It is all confused and hazy for me, what is around me.Sometime I feel I have everything and the very next moment its empty.

I am with friends who love me and even I love them a lot but these days , quite often I seemed to get lost in my own world, world of emptiness.So many things going around me, everyone moving up and down but my life seems to be standstill, struck somewhere.Tough theres not any boundation on me but I feel captive, captive of the thoughts of loss, defeat, end.

I don`t know why am I feeling like this, its just that I haven`t made the things which I always dreamt off.I have just succumbed to the feeling of accepting things.Impatient, short tamper, loneliness and quietness ,this has the world become for me.Every morning I woke up with a smiley heart and pumped up mood but as the day ends  I feel I have again waited a very precious day of my life.

I know I have just taken a wrong turn and I`ll find the way out.

Opportunities I Missed

Past 3 months were probably peak of  opportunities knocking my door and I kept on passing them just to stick to "the thing" which I loved the most.

1. It all began with "another NGO`s" project when I started providing them multi-site single click Drupal hosting that enabled them to start another Drupal website with in 5 min whenever they wished to and seeing this the guy over there offered me to work with him full time which I denied.(Reasons Later)
2. A start up in CBS brought  me in contact with a consultancy firm for which I developed website and did online publicity/marketing to put them on top of all search engines,impressed with my work they offered me part-time job opportunity which could have been my major break through as my first stint with corporate world but I passed it.
3. "An internship providing website" had an opening for which I got a call and I could have done that work sitting at home itself and learnt all together a new platform/terminology of work but I passed that too.
4. In school I had another senior friend he e-mailed me from Georgia where he was pursuing engineering ,to meet his father who needed some help,his father runs a software company,I met uncle he wanted me to join in the team of "SERVER DEVELOPER" just because my friend and he has seen my front-end work and they could make out how handy I can be in setting up server,but I passed it again.

Now after reading all this you would think what on Earth made me pass all these things for ?

The reasons were

1. I wanted to dedicate all my online time to "the thing"
2. I cant definitely go in for full time work ,I was still studying
3. My heart didn`t allow me to move on to something just for money.

I wont name "the thing",coz its still my passion and my first large scale opportunity with which I was from quite a descent time.It`s not that it marooned me but I think I deserved more then what I got!!

I have seen people quickly moving onto other bigger opportunities,grasping onto other things quickly and I felt they dont have a character to stick to a thing and make it big but .............................

I dont know why am I writing all this,its mere a small thing in compared to many other big wrong things but I cant understand why with "this thing"

My First LAPTOP

Finally after such a long time I got my first laptop yesterday (22 June 2010).It`s DELL Inspiron 14R which is 320 GB hard disc 4 GB RAM and the biggest packaging is its intel i5 processor.

On Saturday my computer succumbed to the tremendous pressure i put over it then till Monday I could not find one to repair it and on when Tuesday it was taken by serviceman for repairing I found my room empty but now my new lappy is there and my system would also be ready by tomorrow evening.

I planned for all these days to buy a i3 processor but then I found i5 in the prise I of i3 in one particular shop and that was my target.When dad agreed on buying me a better laptop I was too happy,I and papa sat for 2 hours at shop waiting desperately for the laptop to be configured properly and arrive from the shops another branch.

I think now my efficiency would increase and fight with sister would decrease and with dad too as we three fight to use the system.

Too Happy Today As I Talked To MAMA

Today after so many years I could talk to my mama (in photo the man with turban) his name was Sandeep.Now the world knows him as Ravi Padam Sagar ji ,this name was given to him 12 years back when he became a Jain monk and left all his family,home,wealth to be a priest.
He took up the great opportunity to spread the message of Jainism and peace all over the country with his guru`s and other priests.

He used to live in Kolkata and now after so many years he is returning to Kolkata to 4 auspicious months also known as Chatur-mas to spread the message of sacrifice,peace and harmony.

And today I happened to talk to to him on phone(I know its not allowed in practice but ........) and he asked me to give him a visit on 20th June itself but it was not possible so I am planning to visit him by 30th for a week.It would be great pleasure for me to meet him.In march I spent constant 6 hours in Ahmadabad but I just couldnt find him,but now I have the best chance to meet him and I am not gonna miss this one